What Can I Keep and What Must Be Divided

When we divorce, most people were asking what constitutes matrimonial property. The answer may vary from one country to another. But no matter where you live, automatic 50% not be not matrimonial property pas claim.

Equitable distribution against the property of the community

At the time, 41 “equitable distribution” and 10 “acquests” are States. The property of the Commonwealth States are:

  1. Arizona
  2. California
  3. Idaho
  4. Louisiana
  5. Nevada
  6. Texas
  7. Washington
  8. Wisconsin

divorce property
Equitable distribution

For most people, the concept of equitable distribution in general means a Division of any property. All matrimonial property would be divided basically completely in the middle. In each of the 41 States to deal with equitable distribution, is the tribunal that determines the equitable distribution of matrimonial property. The Court could regardless of that sharing 50-50 percentage speak of spouses. Each of the spouses may in fact get all assets or property.

To determine what is right, the Court shall consider the following factors:

  • Duration of the marriage
  • Assets prior to marriage
  • Income tax liabilities
  • Debt
  • Previous agreements

There are several things that you should consider if your fair distribution of support of marriage are resolved in a State. For example, you realize that everything that you or your spouse is covered by the sharing of acquired during the marriage. It doesn’t matter what name was used to buy the property, or who has money to buy assets.

Parties should not forget that the judges are not detectives and it is not responsible for the detection, if assets are available. Evidence is always necessary before making allegations in the Court. They must prove that your spouse of assets to be disposed of to avoid what they shared. a charge to do is not enough.

Community property

There are only 10 States, the concept of community property to use if active martial split. In these States, property Department automatically start at 50: 50. Here are a few things in mind to keep if you are in a State of community life:

Spouses can increase debt to divorce the spouses are also responsible for all debts or hide.
It would be wise counsel at the Research Board, or the State of different concepts of property for spouses who have dual residency practice Division. There are advantages and disadvantages of these two approaches.
What is marital property?

To detect what matrimonial property is exactly, is to examine what constitutes an individual property. Generally following unique property:

Property acquired before the marriage.
Property acquired after separation

In most cases, debts and assets acquired in common are distributed evenly. There are a few exceptions to this rule, and this debt is transferred to the rule of the original debtor.

Student loans
Game or doubtful debts
Product of injuries

Include real estate matrimonial property can, but it can also contain, vehicles, bank accounts, investment accounts and retirement benefits. While you can immediately access the funds from these accounts, such as accounts in a 401 (k), IRA or pension, is it not yet a marital enrichment. The total value of assets minus liabilities corresponds to the marital property.

Some value of assets before marriage assigned to a moot point is more you are married. The assets before marriage is a 25 year marriage with, for example, very little significant. A marriage of 5 years would be more clear of assets prior to marriage.

Other factors are the contribution of each party to the marriage made available, as well as economic circumstances that affect both sides. The earnings of both partners features are also taken into account, especially when a spouse does not fall outside the work of the House. None of these factors could determine that different levels of division of property between the two parties.

Legal advice on laws relating to the Division of the property in your State are always a wise decision. The Court has the final decision in all matrimonial property Division, and we recommend that you be well prepared to negotiate equitable distribution of wealth.

Power of Attorney

Power of AttorneyOne day, if you can not make your own decisions, following health problems or other issues, it is a good idea to give a proxy to someone to act on your behalf and in your best interest.

There is always the possibility that one day you will be deficient and unable to make their own decisions. Examples abound: a car accident could put him in a coma, or surgery can prevent you from making decisions. In situations like these, I want an “agent” of trust to make decisions on your behalf. These decisions could cover:

  • Personal
  • Financials
  • Health care
  • Investments
  • Business Transactions

A power of attorney document authorizes an agent appointed charge d’affaires for you. The legal system honors this document (notarized) if you are incapacitated.

Total power
If you are ready to hand full control of yourself and your investments to an agent, consider giving full power. Please note that this designation provides an agent full access to your bank accounts, real estate and medical records.

If you find you do not want to put total control of himself and assets to a third party, consider limited power of attorney. Under this name, you can specify which control officer shall, depending on the situation.

Choose your agent wisely
Any power of appointment you select, you should choose a reliable agent who has your best interests in mind. Your agent should be someone who will not try to win your misfortune. Many people give proxy to their old and trusted friend or family.

Discuss responsibilities related to your agent should be able to manage your life. Make sure she is comfortable with the role. There are many situations in which a proxy can be used very difficult and emotionally trying.

Custody Decisions – Child’s Wishes

Child custody decisions are made on the basis of which the Court will serve the best interests of the child or children in question. State laws vary as to if wishes of children do not have any impact on the provision of housing. In some States, parents can ask the Court to take into account the child’s wishes while that in other States, the Court has the exclusive right to decide to interview the child. Children typically testify to your wishes before the judge with only the judge present; so they may not unduly influence the child, parents attend this meeting.

child custody

At the State level, age and maturity most are taken into account. For example, California requires divorce courts take the wishes of children of 14 years or more into account. These children can waive the right to express an opinion, but if they wanted to tell the Court who want to live with the parents, the judge must take into account this opinion. However, judges may decide not to grant a wish child if other factors indicate that it would be against the best interests of the child. For example, if the evidence shows that the child’s favorite father has a problem of drugs or alcohol that interferes with the ability of parents to the child in an appropriate manner, the Court may deny custody to that father.

There are several factors that most courts consider in deciding whether to have a child wishes into account:

  • Level of the age and maturity of the child. Level of maturity of the child is more important than your physical age. One older child who do not exhibit the maturity in thought and behavior are more likely to make a difficult decision regarding their arrangements for custody of a younger child who exhibits maturity more than his years. The courts may be forced to hear the views of a child, once it reaches a certain age, but if the child is not mature enough to make a decision, that opinion may not be the deciding factor. Younger children may be invited to share an opinion, if the Court considers that they have sufficient maturity to make a decision.
  • Living conditions of the parents. Because justice must take a decision that reflects the best interests of the child, the living conditions of the parents are of utmost importance. For example, a father who lives in a small apartment or who is homeless do not have the type of house they need to raise children. Courts may deny the desire of the child to live with the father, even if the father is a good father.
  •  Attitude of parents towards the other parent. Parents must demonstrate a willingness to accept the right of the child to have a relationship with both parents. If your child’s favorite father is hostile towards the father, this often influences the decisions of custody. Divorce courts try to protect children is used to attack both parents, since this type of situation is harmful to the baby.
  • Baby for parents district bonds. Attempt to divorce courts not eradicate children from their communities. Less damaging divorce may be in the life of a child, healthier for the baby. Therefore, if a parent continues to live in the district where the child goes to school, plays on sports teams and has friends while other plans to move, the Court may decide grant custody to the parent that the child remains in the zone.
  • Welfare of the child. Custody decisions are based primarily on child welfare. If the favorite parent is not able to give the child love, attention, time and money you need to grow in a healthy and successful adult, the Court may not award custody father even if the child strongly want to live with that parent.
    These rules show that the wishes of the child are only one factor which the Court must take into account when making decisions. There are some binding standards for custody of the children. For example, the courts may decide to grant custody to a parent living outside the community of the child, if this is in the best interests of the child, even if the courts often refuse to grant custody to those parents.

The primary factor is the best interests of the child. Regardless of what any parent wants or what he wants the child, the courts should take custody decisions based on what the child needs for their physical and mental health.

Determine if a Prenuptial Agreement is Right for You

Do they get married and you’re wondering if you should get a prenuptial agreement before saying ‘ I do?’ Here are tips to help you decide if a prenuptial agreement is good for you.

A prenuptial agreement is an agreement between two people that dealt with the financial implications if the end of the marriage.

Upon entering marriage, each partner has a so-called “prenuptial agreement. However, a large number of people don’t they realize that is known as the “law on divorce“. Many people are not satisfied by the way the divorce law works, so they take the matter into their own hands and customize their own pre – nup agreement before the wedding starts.

prenup agreement

Benefits of a prenuptial agreement
In today’s society, the divorce rate is so high that many people think it’s common sense to get a prenuptial agreement signed before their next wedding. Here there are several reasons to a prenuptial agreement may be the right choice for you.

  • You earn more money than your spouse. If a spouse who earns more than the other, it may be your best interest to have a prenuptial agreement. The pre – nup can be used to limit the amount of child support that must be paid to the other spouse in a divorce.
  • It is richer than your spouse. A pre – nup can be sure that your spouse is to marry by who you are and not your money or property.
  • Your spouse has a high level of debt. If one of the spouses has a significant amount of debt in relation to the other, and he or she will not be responsible for its debt, if the marriage ends in divorce, a marriage contract can protect the other spouse to assume all of its debt. If a pre – nup is not signed and that the spouse with the bankruptcy of the debt high claims, according to bankruptcy and credit bureaus, creditors can go after your spouse to collect payment.
  • You are a co-owner of a company. A prenuptial agreement can protect your business and make sure that it is not allocated between your spouse.
  • To marry again. If she remarries, many of its legal and financial obligations are different from his first marriage. You may have assets such as a house or children from a previous marriage. A prenuptial agreement will ensure that your assets are distributed the way you want them if you die.
  • It is poorer than your spouse. A pre – nup can ensure that the spouse who does not have much money is protected financially also.
  • In order to protect the rights of succession. A prenuptial agreement can protect the rights of succession of their children or grandchildren from a previous marriage, ensuring that they stay with what you wanted.

Prenuptial agreements can be beneficial in a variety of ways to help protect your assets. If one of these reasons is important to you, a marriage contract may be a good option before tying the knot.

Disadvantages of a prenuptial agreement
There are also some disadvantages of a prenuptial agreement, especially for the person who has been asked to sign a. There are several legal and psychological issues that complicate the prenups.

  • Rights of succession may be compromised. By signing a pre – nup, can eliminate their right to inherit property from your spouse if he or she dies.
  • Your feelings are hurt. Attempts to negotiate a prenuptial agreement can damage your relationship before the wedding even. The person obligated to sign the pre – nup can feel as if there is lack of trust and ask yourself if the marriage is going to last. A pre – nup formats provisions on marriage before even it has begun.
  • Is expensive. A pre – nup can cost estimated depending on the complexity of your finances are and how long could take the negotiations. They can cost from a few hundred of thousands of dollars if you are working with a lawyer. There are also agreements of DIY that you can find online; However, you should be careful how you write the pre – nup and be sure that both partners understand the terms and conditions. If it is not written with care, the judge can challenge the agreement if he or she feels that it was entered correctly.
  • Compulsory. Some States may limit what can be included in their prenuptial agreement. If your contract includes elements not approved, it may be dismissed in court. States also require that pre – NUP to be fair and equitable and. check with your State to see what they consider non-approved items.

Filing for Divorce

If you want to get a divorce, you must submit an initial petition for divorce. You can file the petition without an Attorney; However, a divorce lawyer can ensure you do it all properly and may protect their rights in the divorce.

filing for divorce

Get your petition for divorce
Is important that your petition for divorce directly from the Court. Although you can find online divorce applications, the forms that you will find on the Internet may not be suitable to your situation, may be obsolete or can be used in another State. Therefore, visit the family court in the county where you live now to get the divorce papers.

You have your County of current residence papers for divorce differs from County to County. Remember, however, that they usually have to reside in a county for six months to a year until you can get divorced in this municipality. If you have lived in your current country of residence for a short period of time, you may need to get divorced from his previous County of residence.

Fill out the application

Applications for divorce vary from State to State, but there are some standard questions, ask for more requests. In general, you will need to provide the following information:

  • Credentials. Generally, it is necessary to indicate the name and address in the upper part of the application for divorce of your spouse. You may also need the date and place of the divorce of the list.
  • Custody-related information. You must list the ages and dates of birth of the children he had with his spouse. Also, you usually need to declare any request you have custody of their children.
  • Property and matrimonial property. You must give all his possessions at the time of the divorce. If you and your spouse share any property, this property is considered marital property must be listed as such. In some States, all goods are considered to be owned by the couple.

Keep short.!

When you fill out your request for divorce, you must indicate the reasons for divorce. Keep your answer to this question in a few words; If possible, you should use that one phrase. The Court’s divorce is not required at this stage for all the details of their divorce. He wants to know just if you have sufficient grounds for divorce.

If you are not sure of how to enumerate the reasons for divorce tell her whole story, see the list of acceptable reasons for divorce in your state. These are often included in the application; If it isn’t, you can usually find a list of the grounds for divorce by a quick search online for divorce in your state laws.

Submission of the application

After you have completely filled request, not to sign. You will have to wait until you reach the Palace of Justice, so that the clerk of the Court can help your firm.

Make two copies of your completed request before you import it to the courthouse. The Secretary will be to legalize your signature and file the original petition for you. It will also set a date and time for your divorce hearing. Keep a copy for your records. You need to give the other copy to the Sheriff of the County to provide a spouse. It is to serve your spouse with divorce papers.

If you would like your children to live only with you, while the divorce is pending, will instruct the Registrar to set a date for a trial to hear when you file your petition for divorce. Some States do this automatically, while in other States, it is necessary to ask for it, so it’s best to ask. You may need to submit other documents to obtain temporary custody.

What happens after you file

After you file your petition for divorce, the spouse is entitled to prepare a response and send it to the Court. Enjoy a copy of your answer if you prepare one.

His court date, you will have the opportunity to present evidence as to what you should get some marital property, custody of children and maintenance. Your spouse has the right to do presentations, requesting a solution in his favor also. It is advisable to have an attorney for divorce, procedure to help protect their interests. Your lawyer can help you negotiate a mutual divorce agreement just as well represent in the courtroom.

Don’t Hit Send!

“What do I do when my ex-wife sends me emails that really don’t have anything to do with the kids and are just picking at me?”

Good question.

We’ve all been there.

Whether your relationship with your ex is good or not so good, sometimes this happens. An email comes in from your ex and it has that certain “tone” that just sends you through the roof. Implications are made, subtle, but they are blazing clear to you – right? You can feel your emotions rise, rapidly – a mix between anger, hurt, the need to justify and defend and some sadness.

How did it come to this?

So what do you do? Well if you are like most of us you get triggered by the flood of emotions and you quickly hit Reply and start pounding out a response. You are going to explain to this person and boy they are going to listen!

Pounding out the response itself is not the problem.

Hitting the Send button is.

Why you ask?

There are a few reasons not to hit the Send button. First, when we get triggered by a flood of emotions there is a huge chemical rush into the body that takes quite a while to metabolize and while it is happening logic goes out the window. You are reacting from pure raw emotion, old hurts, perceived or actual pain and grievances.

Secondly, what is the point?

To be right?

To explain in the hope of being understood?

If your ex could understand you and accept your point of view you would probably still be married.

At this point in the ball game things aren’t going to change much, not until you emotionally divorce from each other.

If you really feel the need to reply, then get your response done. Pound it out on the keyboard, scribble away on a piece of paper and then file it for a day or two. Wait until you are a bit calmer and then review it.

Do you still need to send it?

Often times you will find that you don’t. Or you may find that with edits that remove the loaded emotion and stay focused on the kids or the issue at hand it can be sent.

Emotional Divorce

So you are now divorced, you have received your Decree Nisi, it’s all done and dusted right?

Hmmm, the question is – “Is it over for you?”

When you divorce you divorce physically; one of you moves out and lives somewhere else.

You divorce financially. In other words you divide up your assets and liabilities and create two sets of accounts.

However, lots of couples don’t emotionally divorce for years.

What is emotionally divorcing? It is where you “unhook” your emotions from the other person. You have separated your emotions away from your spouse or your ex.

For example I see lots of couples who are divorced or separated and one of them is always trying to keep the other “hooked” in an emotional relationship. Now this can come in many guises from calling the other for advice and support, to sending emails that are quite aggressive and demeaning, all in the hopes of getting a reaction or a response from your former spouse.

There are different levels of being hooked emotionally to your ex. Read the list and see if any apply to you.

  • When they come to pick up the kids do you try to engage them in conversation about areas of your life that you no longer share together?
  • Do you use the kids as weapons?
  • When you can say yes do you say no just because you know it will piss em off?
  • When you see their vehicle do you throw your coffee all over it?
  • Do you send food over as a care package to remind them that you are thinking of them?
  • Do you jump when your ex says – hey can you do this errand for me or something similar?
  • Do you look at your ex and want them back?
  • Do you send nasty emails that attack them as a person?
  • Do you drive by their house to see if they are home and if someone else is with them?
  • When you know you are going to bump into your ex do you make an extra effort with what you are wearing and how you look?
  • Do you criticise your ex at every opportunity?
  • Do you try and flaunt your current girlfriend/boyfriend in front of them in the hope that they will realise that they still want you?
  • Do you invite your ex over to “talk about the kids” and talk about everything else instead?

If you do any of these things you haven’t totally emotionally divorced from your ex.

Harsh to say but true.

Now you may be saying to yourself “hang on sending food over or inviting them over are nice things to do”. This is true, but it is the Intention behind it that matters; if you are doing it because you appreciate them as a person, then great. But if you are doing it in the hopes that you can stay emotionally connected to them in a marital way then that’s not so good.

If you are still emotionally hooked into your ex then you’re not allowing any other relationships in, including the most important one – the one with yourself. There is no room – all your emotional energy is funnelled towards your ex, whether positive or negative.

So what do you do? Well, first you have to make a conscious effort to start withdrawing that emotional energy and bringing it back to yourself. This doesn’t happen overnight, so take baby steps. You have to realise and accept that the marriage is done, finished and it is time for you to start creating the life you want to live.

Some people like ritual to symbolise that they are making a shift. One client took a picture of his wife and put it in a little box and buried it in the yard. Another client wrote and wrote and wrote and wrote (we are talking about a 15 page letter) to her ex letting all the anger, frustration, love and pain out onto paper and then she took it down to a beach cried for ages and set the letter on fire.

For other people it is a case of building up their support network so when they feel that they want to “just quickly phone the ex” or “I’m just going to drop by and see if she needs a hand with anything” – they have a friend to call.

Think of it like a 12 step recovery programme for reclaiming your emotional energy and stepping into a new life.

So where are you? Are you still hooked or have you Emotionally Divorced?